Oh Dear ...

You know that you're just a little bit too "obsessed" about being a student of law when .....


Yesterday I went over to Ina's place to visit her at her new home. As usual, after so many promises and i.o.u's, the day finally came and we spent our time together doing what we ladies do best - multitasking. In between her 5 months old "bun-in-the-oven" and her little hyper energetic son, she still managed to gossip, cook for me (as Madame here was fasting and was craving for her daging-tetel masak assam pedas Malacca style) and looked absolutely gorgeous with no make-up and a simple knotted hair-do style. She has always been of those people who looked "collected" all the time - never a hair out of place.

*Sigh, lucky her. I am turning green with envy just thinking about it. I guess some people are just born with it, huh? :(

At one point, Baby Ash - my nick name for Ina's son - Asraff ( although I do realise that the "baby" term needs to be dropped once the time is right, let say, ooohhhh, once he can start voting perhaps? ;) ), was being a little bit more naughty then usual and I can see that it is starting to take a toll on Ina's patience. After repeated warnings of telling her son to stop his tantrums and to stop kicking her legs, she finally gave her last warning,

"Ashraff, if you do not stop this now, I would have no choice but to put you in the court!!"

Oh wow, I was rendered speechless. I mean, yes I have known Ina for more then a decade here and I knew that despite her sweet and calm disposition, she can be one "bad-ass-hitler- reincarnation" once she loses her patience. And believe me, I have had my fair share of being in her line of fire, so when I say "bad-ass", just take my word for it will you?

I may not be a mother yet but I still believe that her decision to put her son in his own 'place' was little bit too extreme, don't you think? I mean, yes, the boy was being extremely difficult and I don't blame her for losing her patience. God knows what I will do with if it was my own child instead. Could it be one of WWE's The Undertaker infamous "chokeslam" move, perhaps? Or maybe Triple H's "indian deathlock"?? (Hmmm, come to think of it, that doesn't sound very motherly now, does it?).

But then again, Ashraff is only a baby, He is not even two years old, for goodness sake!!! I simply have to give Ina my opinion on this matter and to get rid of this feeling of unfairness. I believe strongly in retribution, but I also believe in being just. And this act of hers is simply not acceptable!!

I was about to give her a piece of my mind when Ina finally gave up and lifted the crying baby off the floor and walked purposefully towards me. I don't know whether she saw the 'disapproving look' I had on my face or not. The ugly frown I had or that of my lips tightly pursed together - an ugly scowl in other words. Well, even if she ever saw it, she just paid no heed to the "warning"and just walked passed me. At this point of time, I was feeling a little bit upset and tried to calm myself down and bring myself together before confronting her. I need to be in control of myself if I want to do this right. And being emotional is never, ever a good trait to have - especially in such trying situations.

I took a deep breath and turned around, ready to offer her my view from a different perspective.
I had one hand raised, in a manner almost similar to that of TV3's famous environmentalist reporter "Karam Singh Walliah" - preparing myself for a verbal spar if the circumstances demands it.

Unfortunately, the situation was indeed, as the Malay proverb would say it, "Indah Khabar Dari Rupa" (Not what as it seems to be). In my head I had it all figured out. The problem at hand, the manner in which I will state my case, the type of respond I would most probably receive, my replies to her - supported with concrete evidence and quotations that I know at hand which I have read from the news, books (although, it did not seem to matter to me at that point the fact that she herself is working as an assistant editor with one of the prominent newspaper publisher and I may end up eating my very own words!). In short, I was ready for an epic battle just like one of those from the many famous Hollywood films that I love to watch.

At the end of the day, all that Ina did was in fact - walked passed me towards the crib that she had put up against the wall behind me and deposited her child there. The crib, or in this case, a baby crib is actually a small bed specifically made for infants. It is also commonly referred to as a 'cot' in British English - a cradle or a stock. Ina's was made of dark wood, with fluffy pillows and and a very comfartable looking baby blue and white mattress.


Owwwhhh, "cot" is it?? Not "court" (mahkamah), ehh??


Heheheheheh, well, what can I say? I am a Libran after all. According to "Garfield" (am an avid fan one one by the way), my zodiac says that besides being sociable and artistic, most of the time I am "slightly unstable" anyway.

Phewwww, thank god for small miracles. Else, I would have made a fool of myself in front of my good friend with my "slight" blunder. Pendek kata. kalau tak - alamak aiiii, malu-nye aku!!!!!" *Blush *Blush =)

The New Dictionary

Received one of those 'forwarded' emails from a friend today. I am quite sure this has been circulating over the web for quite a while, but just for the sake of my sanity and the fact I am in great need of some 'cheering' up, I shall post the contents of the email here :

DICTIONARY FOR WOMEN'S PERSONAL ADS

40-ish................................49
Adventurous.....................Slept with all your friends
Athletic.............................No boobs
Average looking................Ugly
Beautiful............................Pathological liar
Contagious Smile................Does a lot of pills
Emotionally secure..............On medication
Feminist............................Fat
Free spirit..........................Junkie
Friendship first...................Former slut
Fun..................................Annoying
Gentle..............................Dull
New Age...........................Body hair in the wrong places
Open-minded.....................Desperate
Outgoing...........................Loud and Embarrassing
Passionate........................Sloppy drunk
Poet.................................Depressive
Professional.......................Bitch
Romantic...........................Frigid
Voluptuous........................Very Fat
Large frame.......................Hugely Fat
Wants Soul mate................Stalker
Widow..............................Murderer

WOMEN'S ENGLISH

1. Yes = No
2. No = Yes
3. Maybe = No
4. We need = I want
5. I am sorry = you'll be sorry
6. We need to talk = you're in trouble
7. Sure, go ahead = you better not
8. Do what you want = you will pay for this later
9. I am not upset = of course I am upset, you moron!
10. You're very attentive tonight = is sex all you ever think about?

MEN'S ENGLISH

1. I am hungry = I am hungry
2. I am sleepy = I am sleepy
3. I am tired = I am tired
4. Nice dress = Nice cleavage!
5. I love you = let's have sex now
6. I am bored = Do you want to have sex?
7. May I have this dance? = I'd like to have sex with you
8. Can I call you sometime? = I'd like to have sex with you
9. Do you want to go to a movie? = I'd like to have sex with you
10. Can I take you out to dinner? = I'd like to have sex with you
11. Those shoes don't go with that outfit = I'm gay

And finally.....

A recent scientific study found that women find different male faces attractive depending on where they are in their menstrual cycle.

For example, when a woman is ovulating she will prefer a man with rugged, masculine features.

However when she is menstruating, she prefers a man doused in petrol and set on fire, with scissors stuck in his eye and a cricket stump shoved up his backside.

*LOL* Absolutely love the last bit. Somehow (not surprisingly), I can actually relate to that very much - including all the 'gory' details.

Hmmmm, does that mean 'Aunt Flo' is coming to pay me a visit soon??